You know those people who are easy to talk to? The ones who naturally keep a conversation flowing from one topic to the next without batting an eye? Or those who make it easier to (cliche alert!) be yourself and are genuinely interested in what's being said? I know a few people like that. No matter what you're talking about, they make you feel like what you're saying is interesting or important. They are some of the sweetest and kindest people you will ever meet, and I would love to be like that.
Recently, I've been more aware of my conversation skills (or lack thereof). I've come to the realization that, despite not being the stereotypical home-schooler, I have managed to mostly become....brace yourselves...socially awkward. I know. It's true. I'm sure many of you are thinking right now, "No!" or "It's not possible! Jennifer is the coolest person ever!!" or "Oh the humanity!". I know. I was thinking the same thing.
But it's true. I, Jennifer Lynn Moore am almost entirely conversationally inept. I wish that was where it ended, but unfortunately, there's more. I'm even worse when I have to actually MEET people and get to know them. Seriously, if I had a reality TV show, my audience would quickly drop off due to death-by-cringe. I'm the most awkward person ever when it comes to interacting with humanity.
Seriously though, all joking aside, I've found it quite difficult to talk to people. Once we've moved past the usual pleasantries of a conversation, I find it nearly impossible to come up with something to talk about that isn't redundant, shallow, not worth discussing, etc. I'm already utterly hopeless when it comes to stimulating conversation - heaven help me if I actually have to begin a discussion. It's not that I'm not interested or not listening to the other person/people - I just don't know how to both listen AND contribute...I think....I don't know.
I'm not sure if what I'm saying makes any sense. All I know is I could definitely use some pointers about how not to be a conversation killer.
How do you people do it?!
You're not THAT bad.
ReplyDeletePeople love to talk about themselves. The trick is to ask them open-ended questions about their own experiences.
Don't worry young grasshopper. You shall learn.
You the daughter and first born of your father who notably has the gift of gab thinks she lacks in this area? Have you gleaned nothing from his learned lectures to you over the years? His countless phone call conversations with you about life, school, Jon etc. Even his ability to do talk radio and give numerous speeches or talks in front of WST. Jen, I think you give yourself very little credit for your ability to hold a conversation especially with him or Joe or even Jon....oh yes and let us not forget your brother Trent who in case it slipped your mind is another Kreslins who has no trouble in this area with you as well.
ReplyDeleteI know there are definitely people who are easier to have conversations with then others. Those that are not are the ones who are more socially awkward and yes they become more of a challenge to engage in conversations, but as Rissa said people more times then note like talking about themselves so you just keep the topic on them and ask away!
Haha, thanks Rissa. I'm going to try and operate in a "tell me about you!" manner. Maybe that's been my problem all along - I get too hung up on trying to think of interesting topics of conversation rather than just talking with the other person. Hmm...you may be onto something.
ReplyDelete@Mom: My trouble has more to do with meeting new people, because you're right...I have 0 problems talking to people I know. I am my father's daughter. ;-)
I appreciate the feedback! :)
Ah its a people you "know" thing. I thought we did just fine even though we only stalked eachother online for 5 years instead of actually ever having a conversation. Haha. I hear you though, I think I come off awkwardly more often than I realize. I am always comfortable with people, but then I tend to channel whatever awkwardness the other person exudes. Yay awkward!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you assessment Jennifer...you are horrible and if I were you, I'd simply not engage the general public for the remainder of your life!
ReplyDeleteSeriously, Marissa has it right...people love to talk about themselves so if you're generally interested in their story, ask open ended questions like I did with you Marissa the other night!
Love you Jenn.