Sunday, November 20, 2011

Husband Card

I love my Dad.  He is one of the most God-fearing, God-honoring, loving, selfless, gracious, hard-working, servant-hearted people I know.  Until Jon came into my life over 4 years ago, he was the main man in my life.  There was never a time where I was insecure or felt unwanted or unloved, because he took his role as "Dad" seriously.  I never felt the need to seek attention and affection elsewhere, because I always knew how much he loved and cherished me.  He was my greatest protector, defender, greatest support, and he has always been a constant in my life.  Aside from my relationship with Jesus Christ, I am the person I am today because of him. 

Whilst cleaning my room this afternoon, I stumbled upon my "Husband Card".  When I was 14 or 15, my dad gave me one of the best pieces of advice (among many) and that was to compose a list of character qualities I would want to have in a future husband.  At the time, I thought it was a strange thing to do, and I actually put it off for a while.  Eventually I did sit down and write it, and I'm so grateful I did and that my Dad encouraged me to so do. 

The point of the Husband Card is to, in a moment of clear, rational, non-emotional thought, create a guideline or check list of all the qualities that would make a good husband.  It would be something I would reference whenever I entered the dating scene and would be looking to find a future spouse. 

When I read it again this afternoon, it was the coolest thing to compare my husband to the things I wanted in a husband when I wrote it.  He matches up perfectly.  I decided, therefore, to write out my card for those who want to read it and perhaps do something similar.  I'm so grateful that my dad encouraged me to do this, because it helped me choose a God-fearing, loving and honoring man to be my husband.  I strongly encourage others who have not yet found their spouse to do so as well - you won't regret it.  So, here it is:

Husband Card

I. Spiritual Character
  1. Strong, devoted Christ Follower (check)
  2. Open about and willing to share his faith (check)
  3. Challenges me to grow in my walk with Jesus Christ (check)
  4. God fearing man (check)
II. Character
  1. Leader (check)
  2. Moral (check)
  3. Hard-worker (check)
  4. Ethical (check)
  5. Not a work-a-holic (check)
  6. Gentleman (check)
  7. Honest (check)
  8. Generous (check)
  9. Kind (check)
  10. Respectful (check)
  11. Considerate(check)
  12. Humble(check)
III. Personality
  1. Funny (check)
  2. Gentle (check)
  3. Open (check)
  4. Serious minded (check)
  5. Talkative, but not "non-stop" (lol, check)
IV. Goals
  1. Start a family (check)
  2. Wants to home school kids (likely a check)
  3. Is willing to be sole provider for the family (check)
  4. Definitely no divorce (check)
V. Requirements Prior to Marriage
  1.  Good, solid education (check)
  2. Graduate from college with degree (check)
  3. Good solid paying job (grad school counts, so check)
  4. Financial Stability (check)
  5. Not a divorced man (lol, definitely check)
VI. Outward Appearance (lol, yup...got that covered too, thankfully, it's not too bad)
  1. Stays in good, reasonable shape (check)
  2. broad shoulders (lol, yup, check)
  3. muscular arms (lol, yup)
  4. Good posture, knows how to carry himself (check)
  5. Strong (yup)
So there you go.  That's my husband card.  I thank God constantly that He gave me my Dad who loved, cared for and protected me, and prepared me to know what to look for in a Godly husband  Praise God for Who He is and the blessings He richly pours on His children who don't deserve it. I'm so grateful for my Dad and I'm so grateful I followed his advice.  It's truly been a blessing.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Patience is a Virtue

One of the things I think God has been teaching me over the years, but most especially since I got married, has been patience. 

As I've mentioned in previous posts, I have this problem with demanding immediate gratification for things I want. I know, it's horrifying when I realize how spoiled rotten I sound. 

Then I married Jon.  In many ways, he is my complete opposite. This tends to be reflected in finances and big decisions we have to make.   Over our year and a half of marriage, there have been many times when I've thought we "needed" something but weren't necessarily able to afford at the time.  I'm ashamed to say that I wasn't the easiest person to be married to during those moments.  Through God's grace however, I have worked very hard to curtail those reactions when I realize I can't have something I want right away.  I've had to be patient and realize that, while I can't immediately have it, if I just practice some self-control, we'll eventually be able to afford it and I'll be none-the-worse for the wear.

While it's been easier for me to tackle my reactions when being patient for material things, there are other issues that have proven to be a greater struggle.  I can't help but think however, that it is another way for God to chip away at my character weaknesses, so that I can trust in Him more and become more Christ-like.  It's just so much harder when the thing you want so desperately can't immediately become a reality.  It's in times like these however, that I have to remind myself of the many wonderful things I do have and be thankful for them.  I know so many others would give anything to be in my position, and I should be grateful.  In these times of struggle, I've found the following verses to be helpful.

Proverbs 13:12 "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life."

Romans 8:28: "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" 

Psalms 37:4: "Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart."

Blessed be the name of the Lord.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Food For Thought...

If there is one thing that discredits the message of the Cross more than anything else, it's "Christians" behaving no differently than non-Christians.  If someone were asked whether or not they thought you were a Christ follower, what would they say?  If someone were to ask the same question of me, I ashamedly have to admit that they'd probably say I'm just a good person.  This breaks my heart more than I can say.

Sure, I can be moral.  I can refuse to curse, gossip, steal, etc.  Does that make me a Christian?  Not by a long shot.  Refusing to behave badly doesn't save me from the just wrath of a Holy and Righteous God.  It doesn't cover the punishment I DESERVE for sinning against Him.

That's why God sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to save us.  We had/have no hope apart from Him.

Jesus Christ lived a perfect, righteous, and sinless life, something we could never do.  Then he bore the weight of our sin and just wrath of God.  He took it all upon Himself so that we wouldn't have to.  


If we truly understood what was done on our behalf, why wouldn't our lives reflect it?  If you realized what you were saved from, the unfathomable wrath of a God you sinned against and the punishment of eternal damnation and separation from Him, the last thing you would be trying to do is lead a good life.  Jesus Christ deserves SO much more than that.  Even devoting our entire lives to bringing glory and honor to Him wouldn't be enough to say "thank you". 

The problem I'm facing with all of this, is that I can't seem to re-ignite the passion I had when the reality of Christ's love for me first hit home.

Monday, September 12, 2011

You know...(2)

It's even harder to not wallow in self-pity.  God, help me dwell on You and not myself.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Saturday, July 16, 2011

"I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by"

You know those times when you have the perfect opportunity to say something witty, but can't because you're utterly incapable of thinking quickly on your feet?  You also know those times when you think of said-witty-comment, after the conversation's over, but still feel the need to say it anyways?  So you tell someone (who wasn't involved in the aforementioned conversation) about it, only to realize that it in doing so, it completely defeats the purpose?  Yeah.  I do that all the time. 

Lol.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Hi Summer! Bye Summer!...wait...it's only July?...oh

Well, unintentionally (mostly) it's been almost a month (possibly longer) since I've been on here.  Oh well.  In my defense, this summer has been hectic, particularly this past month.  June 2-12, Jon and I flew to MD to surprise my brother for his high school graduation and my youngest sister for her 15th birthday.  We were quite surprised upon our arrival to see that that they were ACTUALLY surprised by our surprise.  There were several times when our cover of "not being able to come" was almost blown, but fortunately for Jon and I, my siblings apparently are dense. Operation Surprise-Trent-and-Natalie was a rousing success.  Go figure.

From thence onward, I've been busy playing catch-up with work, due to aforementioned MD vacation.  The nice thing about being so busy is that by the time 2:30PM roles around (which is when I get off) I'm usually surprised at how quickly it got there.  I do enjoy staying busy, but I'm also looking forward to when it'll slow down a bit.  I'll have to wait till September/October - though that's largely contingent upon the weather...and OK weather has had a knack for surprising me.  It'll probably be December if I'm being honest. =)

In other news, Jon and I were thinking about moving to a renovated house in our little neighborhood, but we both decided that for the fairly substantial increase in rent (compared to what we pay now, which is really good), it wasn't worth the hassle.  We'd mostly be upgrading in aesthetics and decreasing in functionality.  Where we live now, it's the opposite, but thankfully at least one of those aforementioned qualities can be addressed in our current location.  Here's to saving money!  Woohoo!

Well, that's all for now.  I've got another blog in the works - different in nature from this and will probably garner more feedback (which will be greatly appreciated).  I figured though, that I'd at least give an update on the goings on here.  As my father would say: I'm alive and well my avid followers - fear not! (I am my father's daughter).

Peace!

Friday, June 17, 2011

You are who you choose to be

Here's a little background information behind this blog.

My brother, Trent, has a rare bone disease called McCune Albright Syndrome which consists primarily of Fibrous Dysplasia (makes the bones brittle and easily breakable) and endocrine system abnormalities (like Hyperthyriodism - thankfully it's no longer an issue).  When Trent was diagnosed with this disease, my parents didn't knowhow to navigate this new phase in their lives.  It was then that they received the best advice they ever could have: "treat him normally".  And they did.  Trent is a perfectly normal, hilarious, intelligent, wonderful, loving, and sometimes annoying little brother whom I love more than I can say.

Despite the severity of his disease, Trent's life-long doctor, Dr. Stanton, was determined to make that statement/advice a reality.  His main goal was to keep Trent out of a wheelchair and walking.  Here is the note my brother wrote to Dr. Stanton after his graduation:

I choked up reading it.

Dr. Stanton:

Thank you so much for your kindness in sending me the check for $75.00 for my graduation. I plan on continuing at our local community college then hopefully transfer to Grove City College.
Thanks to you I am not in a wheelchair and I have lived a relatively normal life. That is the greatest gift I was ever given and on graduation day I was reminded of that gift as I walked down the aisle.
Thank you for everything.

Trent
He's a testament to the fact that you aren't defined by your circumstances, challenges, disabilities, etc.  Thank you to the doctors who gave my parents that invaluable advice.  Thank you to the doctors that have enabled Trent to lead a normal life.  Mostly, thank You God for Your never ending mercies, grace, and love. God truly is sufficient.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Talkin' talkin' talkin' talk..

You know those people who are easy to talk to? The ones who naturally keep a conversation flowing from one topic to the next without batting an eye?  Or those who make it easier to (cliche alert!) be yourself and are genuinely interested in what's being said? I know a few people like that.  No matter what you're talking about, they make you feel like what you're saying is interesting or important.  They are some of the sweetest and kindest people you will ever meet, and I would love to be like that.

Recently, I've been more aware of my conversation skills (or lack thereof).  I've come to the realization that, despite not being the stereotypical home-schooler, I have managed to mostly become....brace yourselves...socially awkward.  I know.  It's true.  I'm sure many of you are thinking right now, "No!" or "It's not possible! Jennifer is the coolest person ever!!" or "Oh the humanity!".  I know.  I was thinking the same thing.

But it's true.  I, Jennifer Lynn Moore am almost entirely conversationally inept.  I wish that was where it ended, but unfortunately, there's more.  I'm even worse when I have to actually MEET people and get to know them. Seriously, if I had a reality TV show,  my audience would quickly drop off due to death-by-cringe.  I'm the most awkward person ever when it comes to interacting with humanity.

Seriously though, all joking aside, I've found it quite difficult to talk to people.  Once we've moved past the usual pleasantries of a conversation, I find it nearly impossible to come up with something to talk about that isn't redundant, shallow, not worth discussing, etc.  I'm already utterly hopeless when it comes to stimulating conversation - heaven help me if I actually have to begin a discussion.  It's not that I'm not interested or not listening to the other person/people - I just don't know how to both listen AND contribute...I think....I don't know.

I'm not sure if what I'm saying makes any sense.  All I know is I could definitely use some pointers about how not to be a conversation killer. 

How do you people do it?!

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Updates Updates Updates

I have so much to say, but so little time. It's been a while though, so I figured that I'd give a brief update on life in the Moore household.

  1. For those who didn't know, I was in the hiring process with the Oklahoma City Police Department up until last month.  After much prayer, thought, and discussion, Jon and I both decided that at this point in time, it wasn't the right path for us to pursue.  I haven't completely abandoned ship, but for the time being, I'll be remaining at the golf course.  Thankfully, I love what I already do. :)
  2. Speaking of the golf course, it's been insanely busy lately.  Go figure, since the weather has been great.  I like keeping busy though, it makes the day go by quickly.  Jon works there now too.  By God's grace, he was able to be hired there for the summer.  Now we get to have lunch together every day. Added bonus of working at a golf course (and very nice one at that):  We get to play golf for free.
  3. Jon and I are hoping to move out of our current residence into one that is sightly-further-away-from-the-train.  As it stands, we're graced with it's wonderful  blaring horn every 2-3 hours, give or take.  Speak of the devil...here it comes...
  4. God has been opening my eyes to a deeper awareness and gratitude for His glorious Gospel and what His Son did for me on the Cross.  Despite deserving God's perfect and holy Wrath, I am covered in the perfect righteousness of Christ.  Jesus Christ is undeniably and immeasurably amazing.  There aren't enough words in the human language to accurately describe Him.  He's indescribable. I'm so ashamed that I often let myself cloud/get in the way of this amazing reality and truth.  I have a lot more to say on this, but for the time being, I'm keeping it short and sweet.
  5. My brother graduates high school soon.  I know I'm only 22, but seriously...it's bizarre seeing your brother, who you've known since his infancy, now growing up, graduating high school and heading to college. It's just weird.
  6. Jon and I have been married for a wonderful year.  It's been the best year of my life and I'm continuously grateful that God knew exactly the right man to give me as a husband.


Ok, that's all for now.  Be back soon!

Thursday, May 19, 2011

"Because I love you"

"In the same month that the Passion of the Christ was released in movie theaters, Newsweek magazine filled its front cover with a close up of actor Jim Caviezel as the bloodied and battered Christ, plus this blaring headline: "Who Really Killed Jesus?"

Isaiah (the prophet from the book of Isaiah) gives us the answer.

Who killed Jesus?

God did.  God the Father was ultimately responsible for the death of His Son.  God is telling us, "I purposefully determined to crush My Son with My wrath - for your sins, as your substitute"

Why?

"Because I love you."

When you're tempted to doubt God's love for you, stand before the cross and look at the wounded, dying, disfigured Savior, and realize why He's there.  I believe His Father would whisper to us, "Isn't that sufficient? I haven't spared My own Son; I deformed and disfigured and crushed Him - for you.  What more could I do to persuade you that I love you?" "

- CJ Mahaney "Living the Cross Centered Life"

Friday, April 22, 2011

Me, me, me, God, me, me...oh wait....

Before I begin, I want to make one thing very clear: this isn't a sob story about how I'm a victim or how my current insecurity is a result of people being mean to me.  No, this is entirely about coming clean on a glaring area of sin in my life.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I am incredibly and insufferably self-conscious.  I constantly scrutinize everything I do when interacting with people and/or cyberspace.  Questions of "How does this make me look?" or "Will saying this make me look stupid?" are, unfortunately, never far from my mind.  It's shameful.

What's sad, is that I've been like this most of my life.

I didn't have a lot of friends growing up.  I often lamented this fact to my Dad, who proceed to tell me that I have my sister (whom I later came to greatly appreciate) and that I'd meet my life-long friends in college.  I was rarely appeased.

Through a desire to have immediate gratification, I tried to pursue this one group of people in hopes of filling a void I thought I had.  Unfortunately, no matter how long, hard or how often I initiated with them, it was never reciprocated.  No friendships were formed and as a result, I became very introspective and self-conscious.  From then on, I've operated from a very selfish, appearance motivated, people pleasing mindset.

As a Christ-follower, this is the last thing I should be doing.  Instead of living a life devoted to glorifying God and dwelling in His love and mercy, I'm searching for people's acceptance.  When I feel like I'm not being accepted by people (i.e. them not reaching out to me, wanting to be the best of friends forever and ever), I berate myself, viewing it as "somethings wrong with me".  My "self-consciousness" ultimately becomes a pity party for me, myself, and I.  I'm being incredibly selfish and sinning in a big way.  My insecurity demonstrates an utter lack of contentment in what God has given me.  Even worse, I'm placing far more importance upon people's opinions, rather than God..

Jesus Christ didn't hang, suffer, and die on the Cross so that I can live a life spent worrying about MYSELF.  He died so that I could be covered in HIS Righteousness, so that when I stand before God, He won't even see ME - He will see Christ's Righteousness.  And here I am trying to be cool.  Geez.

I don't want to be the person that I am now.  I want to be completely consumed by Christ and a desire to bring Him glory, honor, and praise.  I want my identity to be solely found in Him.  I just don't know how to not care about what people think of me.  The only thing I can do is pray and ask that God help me overcome this area of sin in my life, and solicit the prayers of fellow believers.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

"But I WANT that!!!"

So yesterday, Jon wanted to go to Best Buy to check out the new 3-D Nintendo DS system to see if it was all it was cracked up to be.  He was pleased.

While said husband was being entertained by the new gadget, I decided to wander around Best Buy...bad idea.  You're accosted by a Best Buy Sales person at every turn!...ok, perhaps accosted is too strong a word, but there were a lot of them, and I was asked if I needed help by at least 4 different people.  On one hand, I understand their plight - they're located next to, and therefore competing with, Wal-Mart.  Business is slow - that's pretty self-explanatory.  On the other hand, and unfortunately for them, we had no intention of buying anything.  Poor guys. To their credit though, their prices actually were better than Wal-Mart, at least as far as TV's are concerned.

Segue!

Yes.  TV's.  TVs are new, sleek, big, clear, quasi-affordable (without cable...but you can't NOT have cable..seriously...what's the point of having a nice tv then...) and Jon and I have been talking about purchasing one eventually.  I should elaborate on "eventually".  What we really mean when we say "eventually" is: way way way faaarrrr far far down the road.  I should have known better.

So, while trying to avoid the Best Buy people (in vain) down the TV isles, we browsed, checked out prices and imagined what kind and size we would like to have someday.  In my mind, however, I'm secretly getting my hopes up "It's ONLY $400 - that's SO much better than $500 or $600 and we could easily pay it off!  The picture would be so much clearer and bigger! etc".  Sound familiar?  Cats anyone?

I bet you can guess what happened next.  If you can't...well, we left.  No TV, no immediate plan of buying one, and me desperately fighting the urge to throw a fit (not tantrum, mind you).  For heavens' sake!  We can't buy a TV!  Oh the trials....

As I type this, I'm struck with one verse:

“You shall have no other gods before Me." Exodus 20:3

Wow.  I feel like I've been lambasted.

I have a lot to think about.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Ramblings

It's been close to a week since I last posted, and unfortunately, I'm at a loss of what to write about.  To add to this bothersome predicament, I can't NOT write something because I need to breathe life into this blog if I have any hopes of keeping it.

So what's my solution?  Well, as it's looking right now, I'm writing a blog about not being able to write a blog.

What's a girl to do?

Ramble.

Or I can give an update on my attempts at domestication.

It's quasi-working.  I made Ultimate Party Meatballs with Egg Noodles last night (Saturday).  It's probably one of Jon's and my favorite dinners.  Tonight was unfortunately a wash because I (by all accounts, the opposite of what I am trying to do with this challenge) had to work today.  Such is the burden of a working woman.

Tomorrow?  Probably Parmesan Encrusted (strange word to use to describe food) Tilapia.  Mom-Moore gave me the recipe.  It's delish.

Oh yeah!  The house got cleaned this weekend.

Verdict?

Jenn: 3/4 point

Non Domestication: 1/4 point

Monday, March 28, 2011

Christ is Risen

This is probably one of my favorite songs.  I have many, but this one just stands out to me today.

Let no one caught in sin remain
Inside the lie of inward shame
We fix our eyes upon the cross
And run to Him who showed great love

And bled for us
Freely You've bled for us

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Beneath the weight of all our sin
You bowed to none but Heaven's will
No scheme of Hell, no scoffer's crown
No burden great can hold You down

In strength You reign
Forever let Your church proclaim

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

O death, where is your sting?
O hell, where is your victory?
O church, come stand in the light
The glory of God has defeated the night

Sing it, o death, where is your sting?
O hell, where is your victory?
O church, come stand in the light
Our God is not dead, He's alive, He's alive

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave
Rise up from the grave

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Domesticity...or lack thereof

I really enjoy cooking.  The only problem is, I hate cooking.

Quite the paradox isn't it?

I should clarify.  When I say "I really enjoy cooking", I do mean it.  When I'm cooking something on the stove top or oven, with the delicious smells and tastes of nearly ready food, it's wonderful.  When the finished product is ready for consumption, it's awesome to know that I made it and (usually) it tastes really good.  Plus, it's a fantastic opportunity for me to serve my family.

Now, when I say "I hate cooking", what I really mean is, I hate everything that precedes the actual cooking part.  Finding a recipe, checking to see if you have all the supplies, near-throwing-in-the-towel when you realize that you have to make a Wal-Mart run for one key ingredient, then preparing it all to finally be made edible....it's a pain.

Additionally, I'm a creature of habit.  I spent 4 years in college, either having meals all ready for me(cafeteria, not personal chef...though that would have been awesome) or fixing up whatever was fastest and easiest.  I probably made 5-7 legitimate, lengthy prep-time, meals while I lived in an apartment my senior year.  It's shameful, I know.  Aside from those rare times, dinner usually consisted of a sandwich, bowl of soup with crackers, or a bowl of cereal.  If I was feeling adventurous or sick of sandwich,soup, or cereal, I'd cook a chicken breast and add some spaghetti noodles and marinara sauce.  I know.  Impressive....

Unfortunately, aforementioned habits have carried over into married life.  Problem with that is, I'm not feeding just myself anymore.  I've got a husband to take care of now.  That's not to say, however, that he's incompetent or incapable of feeding himself.  He's actually made several delicious meals for us and usually helps me when I'm cooking - he's truly a wonderful husband.

Truth be told, I'm just lazy.  Often when I get home from work, the last thing I want to do is spend 30 mins to an hour preparing food to eat.  It's so much easier to grab a bowl of cereal and sit on the couch for the rest of the evening.

My poor husband.

Well, I've decided that it's time for me to stop being so lazy.  Cooking is a great way to serve my husband, it often provides meals for a few days afterwards, and usually saves money.  It's time for me to start being the domestic woman I want to be rather than the woman who has the desire but no will-power to follow through.

Therefore, my goal for the first week in April is to cook a meal every day or after left-overs are gone.  As a way to hold myself accountable, I will post pictures (granted I figure out how to do that on here).

Here's to domestication! Woo!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Good Morning! Welcome to Church. Here's a healthy dose of perspective...

If you had spoken with me two days ago, you would have found me in the pits of despondency.  Ok, perhaps a little less dramatic, but it still would have been pitiful.

Jon and I had decided to go on a walk before we turned in for the night.  As we were walking down the street, an adorable cat came up to us wanting desperately to be pet.  So, Jon and I being the accommodating couple that we are, acquiesced.

It was such a sweet cat, purring and constantly nudging us to be pet and scratched (behind the ears).  The more we played with it, the more I secretly hoped we would take it home with us.  It was so cuddly and affectionate (as far as cats go at least) and I was already running with the idea keeping it.  It would be simple, because cats are low-maintenance.  We wouldn't have to worry about feeding or walking it because of automatic food dispensers and litter boxes.  If we decided to go away for a week, aforementioned utilities would take care of everything until we got back.  It would have been great!

There was one small problem.  We can't have pets where we live.  In that moment however, that didn't matter.  I was willing to compromise all integrity to bring it home.

Poor Jon.  He had the unfortunate task of bringing me back to reality.   He gently told me that we can't keep it because we signed a contract.  No matter how adorable the animal might be, we couldn't renege on our word.

I was not happy.

Upon hearing "no", I stalked off leaving Jon behind still petting the cat.  He caught up and asked me if I was ok.   I proceeded to answer by listing off a set of grievances I thought we were suffering and how awful I thought our life was.  We don't have any freedom!  "We're locked in a stinking small house for another 5 months!" (that's near verbatim unfortunately).  We can't have pets!  Our house is too small! We have no storage space!....

Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah.

If you imagine the sound of a baby crying, it wouldn't be too far off from how I sounded.

Cut to today.  I have since changed my tune, or at least I've stopped complaining.  It wasn't until after the sermon today in church that I really acknowledged how sinful I was being.  Sam Storms, the pastor, preached  on Job.  Talk about a wake-up call.  Job was a God fearing and honoring man.  God saw this, and so did Satan.  Satan accused Job of only being so godly because of all God's blessings towards him.  God then allowed Satan to wreak havoc on Job's life in attempt to make him curse God.  After the initial wave of destruction wrought by Satan (it got worse), one would think Job threw in the towel, fell apart, and cursed God.

No, rather, Job says this: "“Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.” Job 1:21


Woah.  


Job lost EVERYTHING.  His livestock, his servants, and his children.  In spite of it all he praised God.  


I couldn't bring home a cat and I fell apart.


Needless to say, I was deeply ashamed.  I allowed my emotions to control my thoughts and nose dived into a mood/mentality of discontentment and anger because I didn't GET what I wanted.  You would have thought I was in the midst of a great trial.  If I could have a fraction of the faith Job had, I'd be miles ahead of where I am now.  I have a lot of growing to do, but praise God that in spite of my sin, He has forgiven me and will continue to mold me into a woman worthy of bringing Him praise, honor, and glory.   Praise God!